Blither:
[Dude has just seen the decapitated heads on some spikes]
I see you noticed the heads. Motivational. Those are every fucking bastard I had to climb over to get this job.
Dude:
[Shocked]
Jesus...
Blither:
[laughs]
Foul. They're paper mache. Heh-
[to Recorder]

Blither:
He thought they were real.
[chuckles; then, to Dude]

Blither:
Sit down.
[Dude sits down as he notices one of the 'fake heads' bleeding]

Blither:
Let's get started. Now, I hope you don't mind the recording. We're gonna use it as training later.
[Dude is struggling to sit straight on a seemingly broken chair as Blither is telling him this]

Blither:
What the fuck is wrong with you?
Dude:
Uh, it's, uh, the chair is...
Blither:
[Interrupting]
Alright, we're on a time clock. So let's get started, alright?
Dude:
Alright. Well... so, uh, I'm here for the job, sir.
Blither:
[looking through Dude's resume]
Right, you're a factory worker.
Dude:
I WAS a factory worker, but the factory got closed down. So, I got laid off.
Blither:
I have interviewed fifteen other people for this job. What makes you think you're better than them?
Dude:
Well, I don't know if I am better than them...
Blither:
Well, god damn it, pal! If you want this job, you better reach out and grab it! You better put those fucking heads on the wall!
[pause]

Blither:
You know what? Fuck it, let's go to questions.
Recorder:
What is your greatest strength?
Dude:
Uh... I'm a really good team player.
Recorder:
Wrong.
[Types for a while]

Recorder:
What is your greatest weakness?
Dude:
Uh, I'd say I work too hard.
[chuckles]

Recorder:
Wrong.
[Types again]

Recorder:
How would you move a mountain using only a spoon?
Dude:
A spoon?
Recorder:
If you were in a box, how would you think outside it?
[Dude starts to think of an answer]

Recorder:
Wrong.
[Types again]

Recorder:
Last question: What is the difference between a duck?
Dude:
[Long awkward pause]
And...
[Another pause; Dude is waiting for more to the question, but nothing. Then, Dude stands up in frustration]

Dude:
What the hell is wrong with you people? A wha- a duck? I don- I came here for a job! A JOB! As far as I know, that job has nothing to do with a cocksucking, motherfucking DUCK!
Blither:
[after a long pause]
Congratulations, pal. You're our leading candidate. How does it feel?
Dude:
[Surprised]
It feels good?
Blither:
No, no, no. How does it feel, huh? How does it feel? I mean, how does it feel to put fucking fifteen heads on that wall? I'll tell you how it feels! It feels fucking great, doesn't it? It feels fucking great.
[Starts making pelvic thrusts]

Dude:
[Excited]
So, I got it! I got the job!
Blither:
Oh, hell no. No, no, no, this is just a getting-to-know-you interview. We still have some more, uh, one hundred and twenty? Yeah, some more candidates, but hell of a start, though.

Film

Postal (2007)

Persone

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SerieTv

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